Signage

sign_language.gifI’m at work, listening to the mom over the wall talking about the sign language class she’ll be taking this weekend with her baby. Do you know about this? Baby signing. You learn sign language and your pre-verbal kid does too and voila: communication before your child can talk.

I ask for an example. The woman says a friend of hers took the class and the other day when they were together the baby signed, “I want some more tater tots.”

OK. I was with her up until then. There is no way that a 10-month-old has learned the sign for “tater tots”. And there’s no good way to explain it either. I was one of those kids who got whole grain bread with the King Arthur peanut butter that came in a tub with the oil that collected on the top. Carrot sticks and no TV. I didn’t know what a tot was until I was in junior high. There is no way that some baby has beat me to that.

Besides, I can’t imagine there even is a sign for “tater tots”. I bet you have to spell it out. Or bastardize some other words. “‘Hater’ with a ‘t’…no t-a-t-e-r, not h-a-t-e-t… no…it’s a word…t-a-t-e-r… Like “potater”. No…hang on…second word ‘tot’. Like a little kid. Yeah: hater tots. I mean tater. Tater tots. They’re tasty. Really.”

I push on in my office conversation and it turns out I’m right: there is no sign for tater tots and the kid sure as hell hasn’t cracked it. The child just signs for, “More.” Hmmm. That seems dangerous, although very American consumer in the making. Not what you want during a recession, but whatever. I guess it’s just a tot and not a third mortgage. Plus, now your child can also communicate with your pets. Or at least your hearing cat – if you had the foresight to get one, that is.

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Categories: News, Nuisance, Miscellany

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